i'm not really sure where i'm at right now, in many senses of the phrase. i'm on hold, stalling until i find a better solution. it's hard to know what happy feels like and not know where to look for it. i'm trying not to turn into one of those angsty girls from novels who drive me mad, though. i'm thriving on hugs and support, just they don't last very long these days, which is a bummer. so i'm sorry to everyone, for not being myself, for slipping into sadness when i'm trying to put up a calm face, and for being a pain in the ass. i'll work on that.
today i was walking to the pharmacy when all of a sudden the tears just welled up and i cried all the way there and all the way back. i feel much better now, though, and with some wise words of advice am hopefully a bit more together than i was. i am lucky to have such wise, wonderful, caring friends. it's interesting to be in a sad place but not have it be a dark place.
i don't write about this here so people will read it, but because in a month i'd like to look back and have a reference point. i'm not used to having feelings i can't identify.
also, tomorrow brings a new computer. it will need a name, and i will need help thinking of one.
capital letters are too jarring. i have growing pains. i shouldn't still get them, considering my plates have been fused for years, but i still do. and when i get them, i get them BAD. so ow.
today i took a bath and brought deathly hallows (the sketchy-origined copy- the only one i have at the moment) with me and read "kreacher's tale," because i'd been listening to a discussion and then wondered about the chronology of kreacher's involvement in the horcrux hunt. it was nice to solve that.
MARINERS WIN AGAIN-- HECK YES
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment